Marketers have lost touch with the real world.
They are living in a fantasy land of their own invention, fed by a cultural echo chamber of books, articles and conferences in which people like them talk to people like them.

In fact, the marketing industry is currently in the midst of a mass delusion of epic proportions. This includes the gross exaggeration of the role of brands; the mangling of the role of ad agencies; the mistaking of gimmicks for trends; the abandonment of the most powerful consumer group the world has ever seen; the wishful thinking of social media marketing; and the fraud and corruption of digital advertising.

It’s quite an appetizing menu.

Well, my job is to try to stick a fork in all this nonsense. If this book goes a small way toward accomplishing that, I’ll be happy, and you’ll be entertained. 

Praise For Bob Hoffman’s Writing And Speaking 

“Caustic yet truthful” 
     The Wall Street Journal 

“It’s nice to find a real thinker in the ad business these days” 
     Jack Trout, Forbes.com 


“Bob is the little child who points out that the emperor is wearing no clothes, while too many of his advertising colleagues go along with the hype because it pays their salaries. This man has a great sense of humour, plenty of relevant agency experience, courage. And his position is ethical, he cares about advertising/marketing and the consumer - the same can't be said for so many consultants peddling hype and fads to unwitting marketers….I’m jealous. I wish I'd been brave enough to be this rude.” 
     Prof. Byron Sharp, Author “How Brands Grow” 

 “…fresh, surprising, in-your-face insights into how just about everything we take as gospel in advertising is wrong. What Bob Hoffman is saying is that…we’re going to have to come up with a whole new language and belief system for what advertising is supposed to do, based not on clich├ęs, but on how things really are.” 
     Andrew Jaffe, Executive Director, Clio Awards 

“I began discussing these (ideas) with agencies and staff the day after finishing the book”      
     Neil Golden, CMO, McDonald’s 

"…(Bob’s) presentation on our industry was the best I’ve ever seen. It was smart, well written, and it was at times, hysterically funny." 
     Joe Erwin, President, Erwin Penland. 

 "...the most entertaining talk given during Advertising Week Europe (or any conference for that matter.") 
     AdRants 

"Let me once again say - BRAVO!... a highlight of the week.” 
     Erica Farber, President & CEO, Radio Advertising Bureau   

 
"... the best presentation I've ever had the pleasure of witnessing, truly." 
     Cam Green, CEO, GreenRubino 

“Bob is one of the smartest guys in the business. His thoughts are not obscured by fads, what’s au courant, or quotidian bs. He is a straight-shooter. Honest, to the point and fact-based. Qualities sorely missing in the world today.” 
     George Tannenbaum, author, Ad Aged 

 “This book is an insightful, hilarious look at what's wrong with advertising agencies, with marketing in general, and maybe even the world overall. But it isn't just for people who work in ad agencies. It's for anybody who ever saw an ad that sucked and wondered how it got that way. It's for anybody who works in any kind of job involving generation of new ideas. And yes, it's for anybody who enjoys "Mad Men." Bob Hoffman is smarter than Don Draper. He's funnier than Don Draper. And he's better looking than... Okay, like I said, Bob Hoffman is definitely smarter and funnier than Don Draper.” 
     Joe Norris, CEO Emeritus, SHS

“Whether you like it or not, you now have disciples around the country who will be preaching your gospel." 
     Bill Lavidge, CEO, The Lavidge Company 



From "MARKETERS ARE FROM MARS, CONSUMERS ARE FROM NEW JERSEY"
 
On social media: 
“Tens of millions of disagreeable people looking to make trouble.” 

On ad agencies: 
“The New York Times can publish a 50-page newspaper every day of the year, but these cement-heads need 45 days to create a tweet.” 

On the advertising press: 

“The best way for a loudmouth meatball to grab some cheap headlines is to declare something "dead." The more absurd the claim, the better.” 

On brand babblers: 

“You go to their Twitter profiles – “I’m passionate about brands!” You’re what? Dude, get a fucking girlfriend.” 

On advertising: 

“Good ads need strategy and benefits and differentiation. Great ads don't need any of that. They appeal to us as humans, not consumers.” 

On media strategy:

“Your social media strategy doesn't suck because Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and blogs can't reach people. It sucks because you're stuffing it with crap that no one is interested in.”

On truthfulness: 

“The people I really feel sorry for are the agencies with integrity who tried to tell naive clients that social media marketing was criminal hype. What did they get for their trouble? Fired.” 

On Silicon Valley hypocrisy: 

“I’d like to know exactly what the difference is between 'tracking' and 'surveillance?'"

On talking dirty: 

“I don't mind being wrong but I do mind being timid. Naughty words have a use -- they remove any hint of ambiguity.”